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In working through my goals for 2014, I came across a list of fifty questions that a person should answer to free their mind. The questions were on a site that I found called Marc and Angel Hack Life. I really found it interesting and as I read through them, it was interesting to think about what my responses would be. I decided that I would like to work through each of these questions over the next 50 weeks. I hope you will join me and work through these questions yourself. Feel free to leave a comment with your answer below! 

Question 2 – Which is worse, failing or never trying?

That is a really difficult question to answer. There are times when I know I have let the fear of failure prevent me from even attempting to do something. Do I regret it? Yes, but I also know that I have a hard time dealing with failure in my life. There are many things that I can look at and say that I have failed in some aspect, but at least I did try. Two in particular stand out to me. 

I failed to have the corporate career that I had always dreamed of and wanted. At some point in my 20’s, I decided that I really wanted to make it up the corporate ladder and be at an executive level, VP at the minimum. I got my MBA, I learned all that I could but it wasn’t going to be easy. I learned there is a lot of politics in the corporate environment and I’m not always one to “play the game”. I tried to “play the game” but it wasn’t me. Yet, I continued on. Most recently I was working for a company that had been around a very long time. It was very well established in the industry it was in. I wanted so badly to make my way up and move to the corporate office. I tried putting myself out there, I applied for things, tried to get my network connections going, rocked all the projects that I was given. However, I never made it prior to getting sick with Rheumatoid Arthritis. 

With the fact that stress will make my condition worse, I have elected a new path in my life and one where I can try to make something on my own and have that success that I always wanted career wise. I may not be a VP, but at least I’m trying a different route to get that satisfaction. 

The second is being a Mother. I wanted to be a Mother for a very long time and I finally was in a situation to make that happen 8 years ago. It was scary and I wasn’t sure I could do it, but I went for it. I had many doubts during my pregnancy and even after my daughter was born. I suffered from post partum depression after my daughter was born and she was a very difficult baby. I struggled with thoughts that I was going to fail at raising this child. I couldn’t figure out how to help her, I couldn’t soothe her, and to this day she tells me sometimes that I’m not the Mom she wanted. However, though I still struggle with the fact that I’m a failure at being her Mother, I am at least trying and learning from my mistakes. 

The failures we encounter in life, whether real or imagined, are what help us to continue to learn and grow. If we stand still and stop learning, in my opinion, we stop living. If I had never tried to get my dream career or never tried being a Mother, I would have missed out on the wonderful times I do have as a Mom and I would have missed out on the journey that has led me to try to make something for myself without a corporate environment.

Which do you think is worse – failure or not even trying?